How Do I Find My Mate?
Problem:
I have heard that as a Man of God, I should be looking for a woman who has been hidden. As a Woman of God, I should be hidden and not approach a man for a potential relationship. What should I be doing to find my mate?
Scripture and Text:
Proverbs 18:22 says: He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.
Exercise #1:
What does this scripture mean to you? Should a woman remain hidden until a man finds her? Explain why you believe what you believe.
Complete the Exercise and then Read the Instructions Below
Instruction:
Have you ever considered that the man who wrote the text (Solomon) had 700 wives and 300 concubines?
1 Kings 11:3-4 says: “ He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray. As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been.”
Solomon had a problem with the women in his life and understandably his advice would not be for a man to take a wife who approached him with her own thoughts and ideas on how a relationship should progress.
But, no matter how we read the passage, it never says a woman should remain hidden. It only declares what happens when a man finds a Wife. People use this scripture to make comments like “A Woman Should Be Hid!” and will argue with you if you disagree. This is what I like to call “Church Ebonics”. Church Ebonics are phrases that are adapted to explain church vernacular. If you ask these same people how they met their mate, they will use other Church Ebonics like “My husband/wife/I wasn’t saved when we got married”. When you ask them what it means for a woman to be hidden, they say things like “No woman should be approaching a man” or “The woman should wait for the man to speak to her”. They may say, “God told them” that was their wife or husband. When you ask them how they communicated with the person what God said, they tend to digress into other Church Ebonics to keep from admitting the obvious.
What’s the obvious? I’m glad you asked. The reality is that outside of marriages that are pre-arranged in traditional cultures, Marriage is entered into as a result of a dialogue or communication between two people where they ultimately decide and come into agreement that they would like to be together in a more permanent relationship.
Once you understand that communication is what produces and maintains a marital relationship, you will focus more on asking and answering questions to obtain the answers and results you need to move forward so that you can reach your destiny (Marriage) with the least amount of resistance. If you as a woman stay “hid” and don’t permit yourself to ask the necessary questions of a potential mate, how will you discover where they are? If you as a man are looking for a wife who remains “hidden”, how will you know the real person unless you allow her to be revealed? Communication and dialogue is the key.
I have heard that as a Man of God, I should be looking for a woman who has been hidden. As a Woman of God, I should be hidden and not approach a man for a potential relationship. What should I be doing to find my mate?
Scripture and Text:
Proverbs 18:22 says: He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the LORD.
Exercise #1:
What does this scripture mean to you? Should a woman remain hidden until a man finds her? Explain why you believe what you believe.
Complete the Exercise and then Read the Instructions Below
Instruction:
Have you ever considered that the man who wrote the text (Solomon) had 700 wives and 300 concubines?
1 Kings 11:3-4 says: “ He had seven hundred wives of royal birth and three hundred concubines, and his wives led him astray. As Solomon grew old, his wives turned his heart after other gods, and his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his father had been.”
Solomon had a problem with the women in his life and understandably his advice would not be for a man to take a wife who approached him with her own thoughts and ideas on how a relationship should progress.
But, no matter how we read the passage, it never says a woman should remain hidden. It only declares what happens when a man finds a Wife. People use this scripture to make comments like “A Woman Should Be Hid!” and will argue with you if you disagree. This is what I like to call “Church Ebonics”. Church Ebonics are phrases that are adapted to explain church vernacular. If you ask these same people how they met their mate, they will use other Church Ebonics like “My husband/wife/I wasn’t saved when we got married”. When you ask them what it means for a woman to be hidden, they say things like “No woman should be approaching a man” or “The woman should wait for the man to speak to her”. They may say, “God told them” that was their wife or husband. When you ask them how they communicated with the person what God said, they tend to digress into other Church Ebonics to keep from admitting the obvious.
What’s the obvious? I’m glad you asked. The reality is that outside of marriages that are pre-arranged in traditional cultures, Marriage is entered into as a result of a dialogue or communication between two people where they ultimately decide and come into agreement that they would like to be together in a more permanent relationship.
Once you understand that communication is what produces and maintains a marital relationship, you will focus more on asking and answering questions to obtain the answers and results you need to move forward so that you can reach your destiny (Marriage) with the least amount of resistance. If you as a woman stay “hid” and don’t permit yourself to ask the necessary questions of a potential mate, how will you discover where they are? If you as a man are looking for a wife who remains “hidden”, how will you know the real person unless you allow her to be revealed? Communication and dialogue is the key.
posted by Unknown @ 11:51 AM
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